“I feel like my friend is copying me.”

I am in a new networking group chat and a woman came on one day expressing some concerns. “I feel like my friend is copying me. Every move I make, it seems as if she goes and does the same.” Has anyone ever felt like this? After reading the details of her situation, I realized that I actually was able to relate to this. Her friend didn’t seem to mean any harm,  but she was bothered by it and that’s all it took for her to express her concern to us. 

Here are some takeaways I got from this group chat discussion. 

Copying is the highest form of flattery.

Honestly, you should be in awe that someone is so inspired by you that they want to try to do the same things as you. The difference is that there is only one you and that is your POWER.

You should not take offense by it. Sometimes people just don’t have the same resources as you, so they want to know how you got to where you are.

Lack of direction.

Many people, the millennial generation especially, don’t know where they are going in life. Someone in this situation, may look at their friend that seems to have it figured out, and try to do the same thing as them. This emulation may not be on purpose, but unintentionally “borrowing your formula” to get their own situation figured out. As a friend, this is where you step in, supportively, and try to help them find what their interests and goals are.

Check the vibe.

Only you know your friend, therefore, you should be able to determine what exactly their intentions are. If they are coming to you with genuine interest in whatever you’re involved in, give them some guidance. If they are going about it in a negative way, then that is a problem. A few of the women in the groupchat even stated that they had friends go so far as to try to date their exes. Everyone has their own opinion about how they feel with friends dating their exes. Someone sneaking behind your back to do something that has the potential to hurt you, is not your friend. You cannot be friends with someone who wants to be you. They should have their own identity as well.

How would you handle a situation with a friend like this? Let me know in the comments!